1 Peter 3:1-12
Our Relationship
In last week’s lesson Peter talked about Living Godly Lives in a Pagan or unbelieving Society. We are to live such good lives among the unbelievers that they may see our good deeds and glorify God.
Peter carries on with this theme, of living Godly lives, in today’s lesson.
Let’s read 1 Peter 3:1-6
1 Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, 2 when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. 3 Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. 4 Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. 5 For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to adorn themselves. They submitted themselves to their own husbands, 6 like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her lord. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear.
Many times, those living in a Pagan or unbelieving Society will misinterpret this verse and want to put words in God’s mouth by say He said that all women are to submit to all men. But that’s not what he said.
He tells wives they are to submit to their own husbands as we all are to submit ourselves for the Lord.
Paul said it this way in Ephesians 5:23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior.
Still, those that do not believe and/or trust the Lord will say something like this… ”Well, that’s what Peter said or that’s what Paul said”
For those I say read 2 Timothy 3:16-17 All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting, and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.
Bottom line is, that you are either going to submit as God said to do or you’re going to be disobedient, defying God.
Last week we talked about our obligation to submit to government authority because God has appointed them. This is unless that authority directs us to sin. In that case it is right to obey God rather than men (Acts 4:19-20).
Wives, that same standard applies. If your husband wants you to sin against God, obey God rather than your husband.
What’s the point of submission? Simply put it is to strengthen your husband’s relationship with the Lord.
Just as unbelievers will see Christians’ good deeds and glorify God, so will your husband glorify God because they will see the purity and reverence of your lives.
Peter goes on to say that your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes.
Is there anything wrong with a women dressing herself up, or going to the beauty shop or wearing nice cloths or jewelry? NO!
Rather, that’s not what you should be known for, just looking good. You should be known for your inner self. What I call a good heart.
Peter says a good hearted women has an unfading beauty. That means that no matter how you dress, no matter what your hair looks like, your beauty will still shine out for everyone to see.
Then Peter adds this…. A women should be gentle and have a quiet spirit.
Why do you think that is?
One answer is found in Proverbs 21:9 Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife.
No matter how beautiful a women is on the outside, if she that wants to be the head of the house and arguing with a man, she will drive him away to the far corners of their relationship with her and God.
But a gentle and quiet spirit of a women is of great worth to God because she will draw her husband near to the Lord.
James 4:8 (ESV) Come near to God and he will come near to you. You are sinners, so clean sin out of your lives. You are trying to follow God and the world at the same time. Make your thinking pure.
Ladies, I promise when you help your weak faith man to draw near to God with the beauty or purity of your heart, he will become the man you want him to be by the presence of God in His life.
That’s what God meant when He said in Genesis 2:18 The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”
When a women becomes the kind of wife or helper God wants her to be she will never live in fear that her husband will leave or forsake her. He will draw near to her just as God intended.
Let’s read 1 Peter 3:7
7 Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.
I read this: Submission is also the responsibility of a Christian husband. Though not submitting to his wife as a leader, a believing husband must submit to the loving duty of being sensitive to the needs, fears, and feelings of his wife. In other words, a Christian husband needs to subordinate his needs to hers, whether she is a Christian or not.
Ephesians 5:21 Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
This is about the heart of a godly husband giving honor to the wife.
I also read this: In this context weaker speaks of the woman’s relative physical weakness in comparison to men. Men are physically stronger but men aren’t necessarily stronger spiritually than women.
Read Genesis 1:27 So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.
While men and women have distinct roles in the relationship, God gave them both the ability to make moral choices, to know right from wrong and the same Spirit to believe in and to have a relationship with Him.
A man and a woman our heirs to the relationship with God and as husband and wife.
Matthew 19:5-6 And God said, ‘That is why a man will leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife. And the two people will become one.’ So they are no longer two, but one. God has joined them together, so no one should separate them.”
Think about it this way, marriage is the best earthly relationship life has to offer. We should treat it as such.
A husband who knows the Lord knows how to make his wife feel honored.
The wife of a Godly husband will feel her husband’s genuine love for her, just as Christ loves us.
Read Proverbs 15:29 The Lord is far from the wicked, but he hears the prayer of the righteous.
God has joined a husband and wife together, so no one and nothing should separate them.
If quarrels come between us, separating us from the love God has for us, it makes it harder for God to hear us.
But when a husband and wife get on their knees together, side by side, nothing can stop them or come between them.
Matthew 18:19 “Again, truly I tell you that if two of you on earth agree about anything they ask for, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven.
Let’s read 1 Peter 3:8-12
8 Finally, all of you, be like-minded, be sympathetic, love one another, be compassionate and humble. 9 Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing. 10 For, “Whoever would love life and see good days must keep their tongue from evil and their lips from deceitful speech. 11 They must turn from evil and do good; they must seek peace and pursue it. 12 For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous and his ears are attentive to their prayer, but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.”
Peter now goes from the relationship between a husband and a wife to the relationship of the church of believers.
I have always read, been taught and believe that scripture explains scripture.
Therefore, to help explain what we just read let’s read Romans 12:9-21
Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality. Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited. Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord. On the contrary: “If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.” Do not be overcome by evil but overcome evil with good.
As followers of Christ, the goal of “Our relationships” should be to seek peace and pursue it.
I read this: God took the initiative in pursuing peace with us by sending His Son to earth. Jesus lived a perfect life, His crucifixion paid for the sins of all who would trust in Him, and His resurrection guarantees our justification before God. Jesus is the Prince of Peace, and He is the One who gives us peace with God. That’s why the message of salvation in Christ is called the “gospel of peace”
God says that we must put our love for Him into action by the way we treat one another.